Uncategorized · Writing

Prayer {Five Minute Friday}

Foreword: my writing went deeper than I intended.  It’s not my intention to offend folks; but, this is free writing. This is me: my writing, my thoughts, my journal. divider-clipart-divider_line_med

For the longest time, I had the mindset that God couldn’t use failure like me. Slowly but surely, through devotionals and bible study, I realized the falsehood of that particular mindset. God does indeed use folks: those who failed (made mistakes), those with depression, etc.1 The truth of this has set me free.

I know I can go directly to the throne of grace in confidence with Jesus as my high priest, intercessor, and mediator as long as my heart is right with God.2 I can pray anytime and anyplace. He knows me.

I am constantly catching myself and going directly to God to help me overcome the negative things and thoughts. It isn’t easy; but, it’s becoming easier knowing He is with me. He still uses folks like me.

My life has purpose. What? I have no clue; but, I am content to wait upon God as He holds the future.

divider-clipart-divider_line_med

  1. Some examples: Elijah (didn’t want to live anymore), King David (a murderer), Jonah (fled God), Peter (who denied Christ 3 times), , Job (depression), Jeremiah (wrote Lamentations), and many more.
  2. Hebrews 4:14 – 5:3

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

five-minute-friday-7_small

Nature · Photography

Framers Friday: Shot with a Phone

 The Negative is Positive 

Here is what I wrote:

This is the negative of a photo I shot. I was outside with my cat on her leash when I spot these tiny little buds no larger than 1/4″. I did the caveman squat & shot as close as I could with my phone. I liked the original (in comments below); but, felt it was boring. I played around and landed on the negative. I loved how some parts look like frozen snowflakes and the colors were both pleasing to the eye and exciting for me. So, this is my submission.

The upload did not pick up the aperture. I went into the file data and it’s f/2.4

Additional Details:
Samsung Galaxy S9
1/60 100 4.3

The Original of the Negative

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

Writing

Morning {Five Minute Friday}

Just a reminder: What’s between the lines is free writing. I usually go back and add footnotes to further explain, expound, etc. upon what I’ve written. I felt the need for this reminder because my own husband forgot this tidbit.

divider-clipart-divider_line_medWhile growing up, I would drag my feet getting up in the mornings. Mother was my alarm clock.1 She’d turn on the light and throw off the covers. On the days I didn’t get up, she’d come back, pull me out of bed, and walk me to the kitchen table. It became a game I think we both enjoyed.

The best memory I have is Dad coming out before shaving to harass me with his stubble on his face while I was sitting at the kitchen table on the ridiculous stepstool seat mother doubled as a “high chair.” This often would snap me out of my grumpiness even when I wanted to remain grumpy.

In looking back, I think I was always a morning person since I had no difficulty rising with the sun during the school and summer breaks. I just dreaded going to school. The everyday routines are what kept me sane.  

Today, I often get up while it’s still dark. I enjoy eating breakfast while watching the land brighten as the sun rises. I enjoy the peace of no expectations to be civilized.2 I enjoy the morning routines I’ve established which include updating my BuJo3.

divider-clipart-divider_line_med

  1. I didn’t get a specialized alarm clock for the deaf until I went off to college. It during my senior high school that the world shocked me. This was the first time I got angry at my parents. There were so many things that could have made my life easier growing up.  Instead, I was kept in a bubble of the hearing world.
  2. When I am with people, there’s always the pressure or expectation to “hear” others. The last major misunderstanding occurred with a beloved Uncle of mine years ago when my mother was in the nursing home. I was so embarrassed and humiliated. I didn’t get over it for months. It’s due to this incident that I don’t bother trying or pretending anymore. It is what it is. I’m deaf. I do get anxious and my mind goes a mile a minute wondering what they think of me; but, it’s not my problem anymore. At least, I keep telling myself this.
  3. Bullet Journal. I write down my tasks for the day as well as thoughts, health, etc.  I think this is called Rapid Logging in the bullet journal world except I only do tasks (bullets) and short sentences portion.

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

five-minute-friday-7_small

Photography

Framers Friday: Walls

 Walls, Windows, and Reflections

Here is what I wrote:

This beautiful little chapel was built in honor of an almost six-year-old girl that passed away from cancer in 2011. It’s a building that is supposed to be open most of the day. If it’s not, you can ask for access which I did. This is my third attempt (trip) to get a decent shot. The 1st was a gloomy morning & the camera picked up a haze in the air. The 2nd was in the evening where the sun cast harsh shadows. This 3rd & final attempt was Friday morning & the sun shined on/behind Dan nicely. I cloned out a reflection of my tripod. I chose to go with B&W to minimize the colorful distractions of the other reflections. I used Dan because it’s so much easier than trying to do a self-portrait! Ha!

Location: St. Sophia’s Chapel at St. Ann’s Cemetery, La Vernia, Texas, USA

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

 

Uncategorized · Writing

Still {Five Minute Friday}

Foreword: Social media has become so much more than what I’ve touched upon below. Due to the gradual internal changes within facebook and now Instagram, It’s no longer a way for me to make connections. Maybe I’ve given too much expectations of the platforms. But, I find social media is too much work for me these days.

divider-clipart-divider_line_medSocial media do not give me the clues I need to gauge truth or lies. Behind the words, are there smiles in the eyes? Is there a storm brewing inside? I speak from history observing, questioning, and wanting to be of service. Words lack these very things I need to gauge truth or lies. People create facades to hide behind. Constant positivity causes me to question perspectives. Where is the truth?

After all, life is not all roses without thorns.

Folks on social media do not behave like they do in real life. Taking the time to write out your thoughts with others in mind is extremely important. War of words breaks out, and friendships are no more.1

I’ve begun to realize that reality is often a facade too. Social cues and clues may be lies. As a result, I do not know what’s truth. Whereas I once thought I knew someone, I feel as if I gained insight through words into how they truly feel towards another.

I find their lack of respect disturbing.divider-clipart-divider_line_med

Social Media (for me) is too quiet and scary at this moment. It reminds me of a cat calmly patiently waiting to pounce. It’s too still.
I am sensing a disturbance in the force.
Ha!

  1. I’m often not a participant in verbal discussions due to deafness. These are my thoughts based upon observation.  When folks have conversations and discussions, they may get loud due to not feeling heard; but, they seem to be more thoughtful and/or respectful.

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

five-minute-friday-7_small

Photography

Framers Friday: Low Key

Impish

Here is what I wrote:

I originally planned to use my husband to get his portrait; but, he’s very busy this week. So, I chose to do another self-portrait. I was 56 years old last week & I’m now 57. It’s appropriate to take a trip to the dark side, is it not? I goofed around with a variety of looks/poses. This is my favorite. I used a 1/2 CTO gel filter for the 1st time with my MagMod MagSphere diffuser. I was curious to see the effect of a CTO. It’s also my first effort at butterfly lighting. Thanks to a mini-group member for reminding me of highlights. It improved the look of this image immensely. My hands looked whiter/lighter than my face & at the suggestion of several members, I darkened them up a tad post-processing.

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

Uncategorized · Writing

Treasure {Five Minute Friday}

divider-clipart-divider_line_med

I’m at heart a collector. I used to collect postal stamps in my youth. Unlike coins, which my father and brothers collected, postal stamps told stories. As I got older, my thrifty nature conflicted with the desire to collect stamps. They also took up space and collected dust. So, as hard as it was for me, I stop collecting them.

The only thing I collect or hoard these days, besides books, is mini Lang boxes. For some unknown reason, the Fingers store sent me two invites to get one free the year I graduated from high school. So, I ended up with two of them. I loved those things. One of them became a small personal memento holder.

Throughout the years, whenever I spy one at an antique store, a flea market, or yard/garage sales, I’d immediately check it over for the condition and price. If the condition is good and the price is right, I’d purchase it.  The last one was purchased a couple months ago from an antique store in Huntsville, Texas.

The boxes are currently holders and containers in addition to being used to display items. I’ve lost count of how many I have. The last count was twenty-two. I do believe it’s now twenty-four or twenty-five. And not all of them are the same. I have what I call Tall Boys. They are rarer, taller, and older than the ones I received when I graduated.

divider-clipart-divider_line_med

My mindset has changed throughout the years. I no longer collect dust makers. In fact, I’ve gotten rid of many with the exception of books I plan to read. The Lang boxes are a different story. They also have a purpose (function).

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:19-21

Leeann_EthnicFlava_jenntags12-vi

five-minute-friday-7_small